Feel Like a Failure?
Sunday, January 24th, 2010 | Uncategorized | 3 Comments
Did you set weight loss resolutions this year that haven’t quite panned out the way you had imagined? Do you feel like a failure once again? This failure mentality is often at the core of the weight loss process – but it doesn’t have to be. Each failed attempt is an opportunity to learn a little more about what doesn’t work for you. The bottom line is NOT that you are just a failure and can’t lose weight. The problem is in the approach you are taking. For some reason our culture loves the punishment approach – keep punishing yourself until you get it right. Restrict your foods. Force yourself to exercise. And beat yourself up when you don’t do these things perfectly. Keep doing it this way if you want to feel like a failure over and over again.
For a different outcome, try a different approach. Detach your sense of self-worth from your weight loss efforts. Also realize that your ability to succeed with your weight is a very different animal than other successes in your life. This arena requires an entirely different rulebook – a rulebook that is not based in logic, but in love (self-love).
More than a year and a half into my journey with Women’s Way (and more than 80 pounds lighter), I feel like I am finally learning how NOT to use the “punishment approach” and how to value myself despite the ups and downs on the scale. I am trying to learn from each “failure” along this path, and love myself whether I am being successful that day or not.
A well timed entry. I’m fighting the flogging and “all or nothing” approach right now. Thank you.
I received an email that Women’s Way is now following me on Twitter, and that drove me to your website. Looking at your listing of blog posts led me to this particular post that has really resonated with me today. I’ve just started back on WeightWatchers…actually I just resigned with them…but after 5 days, I STILL haven’t been able to get started on the program. Too much “stuff” in my head. This post, however, has addressed exactly how I’m feeling today…a FAILURE, yet again! Thank you for reminding me that “failure” is not the way to look at this, and that the “punishment approach” accomplishes nothing but self-defeat.